I'm addicted to the body. I'm the body. I'm meat, meat, and meat.
Since I was a kid, I like to look at people's bodies, and I like people to look at me. Like a demon.
That's when I pushed the good boys into the house and took a bath with me. Water slides through our bodies, clean, transparent, soft. The structure and color of the meat is very young and fresh, and I slowly touched her like a smooth soap, and it smells good. Aunt upstairs, I never had a chance to touch it. I just sat on the stairs and watched her walk by. In the summer, she wore very thin heels, purple shoes, flashes on the face of her shoes, followed by probably as long as my middle finger. As soon as she went into the hall, the shoes were givin', the sound of the gibberish came in, and I sat on the side of the wall on the second floor, first the purple shoes entered the sight, then the white feet, the toes, the backs, the bones of her ankles, the calves, stretching up like teeth, to the delicate knees, covered by a black and half-dressed dress, with tiny laces on the knees.
I want her to have teeth like legs. When I looked in the mirror, I imagined I was her.
I watched TV all the time during the boring summer of school. The old Hong Kong TV drama, the long European love films on local television stations, the long sex scene, one person, wrapped in hot blankets, looked back and forth. I imagine things happen in my bed, I'm the star, I'm the star. My body is the center of every scene. I always take my clothes off and pose in all sorts of positions, and imagine that I'm being placed on a screen right now, where millions of people can watch and play.
How about me in the mirror compared to the movie star? It's okay. It's okay.
That's when I broke up with a boy in love. He dumped me, and I took revenge on him: go to the yellow website, open the voice chat room, Wen-ho, give naked pictures, turn on the video, and get me in line every day. They won't be happy without me. When I get on the line, I'm a guest.
Later, the university graduated with nothing to do. I started making money out of contract guns, running one-on-one services. There were so many men, every one of them complimented me, and I gave you a reward. I have to say I'm beautiful, I'm great, I have to say it differently. I feel freest when I'm naked. I'm worth a fortune! The man who was with me knew that I was living on this camp and was spending my money!
One day he said, "Imitation of the kiss position of the male population": "Well, isn't today a date? Why didn't you go?" (silence).
Unconscionable idiot. I'm leaving him again for this city. Here, there are promises to make me a star. My face and my body can be on the screen so many people can pay for it. If you want to get into the show, you have to be tricked a few times. It's a lie to get new opportunities. I can sleep in circles for a little part. I can't leave my children with wolves. Chaos is messy, but I'm happy in it. I love watching myself in the monitor, lying, pretending to be a fake.
When will you be famous? Lights, long skirts, front close-ups, hot-eyed eyes... I can't stand a moment. Shoot me. I'm selling. And then I realized that naked pictures and videos were so hot on the Internet that I was crazy. I've been busy with three cell phones, more than ten groups, and I can't get a minute off. Someone wants to see me, somebody buys me, and it's never been a day. You've never had that kind of happiness.
Someone always wants me. Just my body in, the deal won't fail in a day, and I'll be happy forever.
"I'm watching."