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Every time I write something, I don't know what to write, but I'm a little weird, slow, not very logical, and I have to think a little bit about it, from the door of the studio, from the yard, to the floor where the water is pouring out, to the painting of "The Home" on the wall or the little Buddha on the table...
About last winter, I wanted to leave something for myself before my birthday, because I felt like I'd spent the last 25 years with a thick leaf and grass, so I wanted to add a sense of ritualism and take pictures. And then one day, when I was bored walking around the bean petals, I saw the cameraman's post, which was already out of my mind, and now the word that's left in my head is "real," "no fix," "respect."
As a girl, it's not safe to go to a strange studio alone to take pictures of a strange man when the time and place are set up with a photographer before leaving? That afternoon I went outside the studio door, and before I went in, I got a private letter from a girl who asked me if I was going to this project. I want to say safe and secure here.
1＃
I can't remember the first time I saw a photographer, but it's probably more permanent, but it's autumn, afternoon, twilight and long hair. It was always thought that boys with long hair would be like this, but the photographer was a warm man.
When I came to the studio to sit down, I had a brief personal chat, and the photographer gave a brief account of his experience and project, and was very patient in answering and sharing my questions. There is not much to share here about the filming process and details, but the whole process is very comfortable, whether it is the respect that it represents or his understanding when talking to the photographer.
I myself would rather split the process into two parts, one self-exposure phase, starting with a few simple self-presentations, and the photographer is a person who makes you want to slowly reveal a part of your reality, so that you don't think that something you're hiding in the depths is invisible. With regard to some of his childhood experiences that I do not want to talk about, I like it when I say it, he does not analyse, comfort, appease or break conclusions to the same sense or rationality as most people, but just listen to me slowly, so I feel like I've been talking about this for so long that I can't stop crying. But I just used "over," you know? That's when it's open. I don't think I'm gonna cry again when I'm gonna talk to anyone, or even if I'm gonna cry, I don't feel like I'm gonna get stabbed again. It was read earlier that "the past is inexorable, and only when it is clear can the inner peace be achieved".
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The second part is photography. I love the dark stage of the black velvet.
It can sometimes be dangerous and defensive, but sometimes it can give people a sense of security. When you're in the middle of a dark stage with your own relaxed position, you're in a different emotional state under a photographer's description, you hear the sound of the door, you don't have to pose before taking pictures, you've got a good look, and you don't know what kind of mood you're going to have, you've got a feeling of disguising and drifting.
3＃
Finally, it would have been almost a year later to look at the photo, and it would have been two weeks after it had been taken, forgetting why it had been delayed in winter, after spring season, and the epidemic had been dragged into the dark stage again, for the first time having seen a picture of itself so big that it was full of projection screens, for the first time seeing a picture of itself that it felt strangely unknown or unwilling to see itself, but also for the first time, under the guidance of a cameraman, willing to face a self that had been crushed by itself for so long. I heard a slight tick from the sound when I calmed down, and the photographer said to me sincerely.
So, if you're willing to find the part of yourself that was lost, abandoned and real, you'll have some courage.
♪ And dream into reality ♪
Two men's play.
Goodbye.
"I'm watching."